First Peter 3:1-13 is still in the section concerned with a life in an excellent manner toward all men in all concerns (2:11—3:13). In this section we have already covered the living of the believers as pilgrims among the nations (2:11-12), the believers being subject to every human institution (2:13-17), the subjection of household servants to their masters (2:18-20), and the model of Christ (2:21-25). In 3:1-7 Peter is concerned with marriage life, and in 3:8-13, with common life.
In Ephesians 5 Paul gives a word concerning married life that is familiar to every reader of the New Testament. But Peter’s writing concerning married life in 3:1-7 also has some very good points, even the topmost point. The most outstanding point is what Peter says about a husband and wife being “joint-heirs of the grace of life.” Paul does not say anything about the grace of life, much less about a married couple being joint-heirs, or co-heirs, of the grace of life. In 3:7 Peter says, “The husbands, in like manner, dwelling together with them according to knowledge, assigning honor as to the weaker, female vessel, as also joint-heirs of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” Peter wanted the husbands and wives to realize that they are heirs together, not of property or material possessions, but of the grace of life.
Perhaps you have been a Christian for many years and yet do not have any understanding of what Peter means by the grace of life. Some may not even know that there is such an expression in the New Testament. Christians are familiar with the grace of salvation or the grace of forgiveness. Actually, it is not even necessary for us to read the Bible in order to have the concept of the grace of forgiveness. But the term, the grace of life, is a uniquely biblical expression. The problem is that, when we read about this, our mind may be veiled, or we may not pay adequate attention to this term. By the Lord’s mercy, we would place a proper emphasis on this matter so that we may all appreciate it. I hope that we all shall see the wonderful matter of the grace of life. The grace of life is something real and substantial that we can inherit. This is not merely unmerited favor; it is solid, substantial, spiritual property that can be inherited by a husband and wife. Hallelujah for the grace of life!
We have pointed out that in this Epistle Peter has much to say about grace. In 1:2 he says, “Grace to you and peace be multiplied.” Peter desired not only that grace be with the saints, but that grace be multiplied to them. With the thought of multiplied grace as the base, Peter goes on in 4:10 to speak of varied grace: “Each one according as he has received a gift, ministering it among yourselves as good stewards of the varied grace of God.” We all should be good stewards of this varied grace in different aspects and of different categories. Then in 5:10 Peter speaks of the God of all grace. Therefore, in 1 Peter we have four unique expressions concerning grace: multiplied grace, grace of life, varied grace, and all grace. Although Paul has a great deal to say concerning grace, he does not use the unique expressions Peter uses in his first Epistle. I deeply appreciate what Peter says in this book concerning grace, in particular his word regarding the grace of life.
Let us now go on to consider 3:1-7 verse by verse. Verse 1 says, “In like manner, wives, subject yourselves to your own husbands, that even if any disobey the word, they will be gained without a word through the manner of life of their wives.” The phrase “in like manner” refers to the subjection of the household servants to their masters, as described in 2:18. Therefore, as a household servant submits himself to his master, so the wives should subject themselves to their own husbands. This kind of word is certainly contrary to the emphasis of the so-called women’s liberation movement. That movement is against the Bible, for it is against God’s ordination in His creation with respect to male and female. Using Peter’s expression (3:7), God created the females weaker vessels. What country would use women as the main fighting force in the army? Females are weaker physically and psychologically. For this reason, it is easy for women to shed tears, which are often a sign of weakness. Furthermore, it is easy for a female to be troubled in her mind or emotion. All these are signs that the female is a weaker vessel.
Like Peter, Paul teaches the submission of wives to their husbands. However, unlike Peter, he does not tell us that females are weaker vessels. Concerning this matter, once again Peter uses a particular expression in pointing out that the females are weaker vessels.
In verse 1 Peter charges the wives to be subject to their own husbands. Paul also did this. Some women may find it easier to submit to someone else’s husband instead of to their own husbands. Also, they may appreciate another’s husband more than they appreciate their own husband. Even in the church life sisters may find it easier to subject themselves to a brother other than their own husband. The reason for this is that the wives know all the defects and shortcomings of their husbands, having lived with them in married life. But they do not know so much about the defects and shortcomings of others. This is the reason they may appreciate other brothers more than their own husbands.
Once a sister comes to know the defects and shortcomings of her husband, she may feel cheated. Having had the concept that her husband was very nearly perfect, she may wonder if she has made a mistake in marrying him. In the world, when wives come to this point, the result is often divorce. But by the Lord’s grace Christian wives should subject themselves to their own husbands.
Paul says that the husbands should love their own wives. However, in his word concerning married life, Peter does not tell the husbands to love their own wives. First he charges the wives to be subject to their own husbands. Then he charges the husbands to dwell with their wives according to knowledge (v. 7).